Have you gotten this bit of right-wing email spam yet? Subj: FW: I AM RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT
I NEED YOUR VOTE! I HAVE DECIDED TO BECOME A WRITE-IN CANDIDATE FOR PRESIDENT!!! HERE IS MY PLATFORM:
(1) Automated telephone recordings stating 'Press 1 for English' will be immediately banned. English is the official language, speak it or wait at the border until you can.
(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'Wal-Mart policy 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'
(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.
(4) Military personnel will man our many observation towers on the southern border. They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens.
(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will be able to touch it.
(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade, as you and/or your children will attend school to better yourself.
(7) Professional Athletes/Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive/banned for life.
(8) One export will be allowed, Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.
(9) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.
The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress.
The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.
Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes but a vote for me will get you better than what you have, and better than what you're gonna get. Thanks for listening, and remember to write in my name on the ballot in November. God bless America ! Who wants to be my VP ???
My husband and I usually ignore this tripe, but this one "got under [his] fingernails." Here is his response and one of the many reasons I am proud that we will celebrate twenty years together next month.
Dear Presidential Candidate:
The bit about Wal-Mart is too funny.
The import ban would put Wal-Mart out of business virtually overnight, since their entire business model is built upon cheap Chinese imports and cutthroat internal labor practices. Wal-Mart is far and away the largest single U.S. importer of Chinese goods, and they would have very little left indeed on their shelves if foreign imports were cut off. Most people don't realize that the manufacturing source for almost all the brand goods and appliances that we know and grew up with, from Frigidaire air conditioners to Mattel toys, now resides in China (or in some cases nowadays, Vietnam). Start looking at labels--even Black & Decker power tools are built in Asia. America no longer has the light industry manufacturing infrastructure to be self-sufficient and hasn't had it since the eighties. Who's the number one consumer and manufacturer of steel? China. Who just passed the U.S. in total Internet usage? China. This is not going to change--this particular horse left the stable a long time ago!
Instead of looking backwards and wishing for the days of the 1950s and early 1960s to magically re-appear, this country would be better served by concentrating on the things the U.S. still has a demonstrable edge in, like high-technology goods and services. Boeing and Intel are good examples. Our university system is still the envy of the world and is still capable of feeding the seeds of great innovation to our nation's industry sectors, but we need to devote much more attention to education in general to stay competitive in the world market--something that hasn't happened during the Bush administration. "No Child Left Behind" has been little more than a publicity stunt.
Ignoring the humor value of the right-wing silliness about foreign aid--which is a drop in the bucket compared to our monthly expenditures in Iraq--the fiscal policies of the idiot, er, Texan we have in the White House have brought us to ruinous national debt levels. In no other time in all of American history have tax cuts been passed and maintained in time of war.
While cutting taxes, Bush has used issuance of Treasury bonds (i.e. national debt, the country's credit card, so to speak) to finance his Middle Eastern adventure. (And just guess who's holding well over a trillion dollars of our Treasury debt? You guessed it: The People's Republic of China.) But just like poor people whose spending sprees finally come to a screeching halt because they've maxed out their credit card limits, the bill is coming due on this administration's insane spending policies.
Regardless of who is elected as the next president, his first term is going to be very painful indeed. When even Wall Street bond traders worry out loud about the country's debt load (and trust me, these greed-meisters make sickening amounts of money every time the Fed prints more Treasury securities--i.e., government debt--for them to buy and sell), I get a sick feeling in my stomach. The next president is going to be facing some very painful political choices even if the Iraq entanglement is wound down relatively quickly. Something has to give pretty soon--and it's going to be tax rates.
As to the other items:
#1 - tough one--can we afford to lose all that tourism income, even from ritzy (read: white European) non-English speakers?
#2 - 'nuff said.
#3 - silly, and why should we penalize those with the least money to buy essential items?
#4 - reminds me of the good old days...in East Germany along the Berlin Wall.
#5 - too late. Check Mr. Bush's activities re Social Security funding. His tax policies are gutting the program, and Medicare.
#6 - I love the idea of more education, especially when you link it to an assumption that everyone is a crack addict.
#7 - thumbs up on this suggestion.
#8 - truly, this is some kind of Cajun voodoo economics cooked with lots of chili peppers.
#9 - I love thinking about the cost of the bureaucracy it would take to consult everyone as to their charitable inclinations and collect money from them.
#10 & #11 - Pledge of Allegiance and National Anthem - I'm definitely down with these -- good medicine.
Well, Mr. Presidential Candidate, good luck in the race for 2009!
For the record, I'd like to point out that the candidate doesn't demonstrate the ability to count past #9, so kudos go to my hubby for giving him the benefit of the doubt. Love you, honey!Related posts:
Bush Saves Social Security?Idiocracy Now Qualifies as a Documentary
Say it ain't so! Philandering one-balled bicyclist Lance Armstrong and free love advocate Kate Hudson have called it quits! I, for one, am shocked and dismayed! Click here for up-to-the-minute details from US Weekly. Just kidding--I know you don't really care.
I'm not excusing that slut Armstrong by any means. But this leg-shaving, spandex-wearing hound has lucked into more OPP than anyone in the history of cycling and he's going to get it while he can. Ball cancer's the best thing that ever happened to him.
